The premise of working with partners of HAs

The book, “When the Glass is Full: The Art of Living with a High Achiever” is no longer available in stores (there’s a new edition on the way, click here), but I’ve had a lot of women resonate with the description in the introduction. Perhaps it will help you define some of the issues you’re dealing with.

Introduction

This book is for women who are in relationships with high achieving men. Like any description that is told in the general sense, it is more an archetype than a reality. Nevertheless, every facet of this account is drawn either from my own life or the lives of the women around me. If you are in a similar relationship, you will recognize aspects of your own life here.

You live alongside a powerful dynamic. Regardless of the type of personality you have, a high achiever can often be an overwhelming presence in your life. It is a pleasure to support someone you love as he strives to achieve his goals, but unless you are clear about the boundaries of your contributions, the relationship may take a toll on your efforts to achieve your own dreams.

Being around a high achiever can create a struggle in your ability to remain focused on the things that matter to you. As he concentrates more on the goals in front of him and as the demands continue to grow from his organization or career, you may find that the majority of your time is spent as part of a support staff while you stand on his sidelines, and that may not have been a conscious choice on your part. It may continue until you find yourself years down the road with nothing to show for your own aspirations and talents but a nagging sense that somehow, the life you’ve been living isn’t a true reflection of who you are or the gifts you have to offer to the world.

This dynamic can distort your life and produce attitudes and behaviors that create trouble in your relationship and trouble in your sense of self-worth. As you read about the way the dynamic manifests itself in a woman’s life, you may be surprised to find yourself in one of the descriptions.

But the story doesn’t stop there. Although the telling of it helps validate the challenges of life with a high achiever, I write the story as a premise, as a springboard for the possibility of a change that I believe will interest you.

If you are a woman whose spends more time than she would prefer as a supporting player or an accessory to someone else, you will learn that it is possible to transform your life into a creative, self-directed existence that picks up where you may have left your dreams. This book will describe the premise of how to make that change happen, and will help you dissolve the limitations that may have you feeling trapped and disappointed.

Perhaps the most intriguing aspect of this new possibility is that a very dramatic transformation in your life can occur without changing anyone around you. Indeed, it hardly speaks to those relationships at all except to suggest that if you are dissatisfied with your life, making changes to other people and outside circumstances won’t fix things. Instead, I challenge you to reflect on the possibility that the limitations you experience now have very little to do with anyone but yourself.

I will introduce you to a philosophy that will show you how to create a wonderful life that you’d love to live, without running away from the life you have now, or changing any of the players. This transformation of direction will initiate a dramatic change in how you and those around you perceive your value as a person. In addition, we’ll look at the concerns you may have about how to gain the support of others in your quest to have a more meaningful life.

I created a life for myself that is self-directed, exciting and dynamic. It is a life that utilizes my personal interests and talents; aspects of my individuality that were once sitting on the sidelines watching someone else’s parade go by. It wasn’t an accident, and it wasn’t a miracle. You can also create this transformation. I invite you to join me in stepping out of a life of limitations and creating a life that will fulfill your innermost dreams.

It is my ardent wish that this book opens you up to the possibility of a potential that lives inside of you and waits to contribute your unique gifts to make a difference in the world while you are living a life you love.

Contact Carol at Carol@CarolSetters.com or call her at (303) 319-3505.