Most high achievers have trouble defining what it is they want in a partner. They know that the old paradigm doesn’t work anymore, but what does work? Someone as ambitious and hard working as they are? Someone laid back who can keep them grounded and nurtured?
The good news is, Mr. or Ms. Right can be anyone your heart desires. Chances are they’ll be someone you’re physically attracted to whose personality is totally different than anyone you thought you’d end up with. And that’s okay, because the chemistry needed to make you fall in love is uniquely and mysteriously your own.
Instead of wondering who the right person is, focus instead on what the right relationship is. Your relationship is a third entity that is more than the sum of the two of you. It’s a quality that blankets the experience you have with each other. You can create a remarkable relationship with any number of partners, but not if you don’t know what you want. You have to have that part defined. Keep your focus on identifying your ideal relationship. Identify the qualities you want to have with a significant other.
For example, you may want to create an ideal relationship where you don’t have to hide what’s happening in your career (requires good communication skills); where you’re free to keep your upward career trajectory (requires holding your boundaries and honoring theirs); where they get what they want, and you get what you want (helps to know how to make direct requests and be a good listener).
It isn’t a mysterious event that always happens to someone else. You can create that in your own life. You just need to know what you want and the skills to implement that vision. If you’re a high achiever, you already know that drill.
